...why sometimes, I have to chose between Diet and "Real Life"
I can't go running today cause I got so much to do. Even just 45 minutes would be too much, cause afterwards I need Stretching and a mineral shake, and then it will be over an hour 'wasted' and I can't afford it right now. It sucks and I feel bad for it, firstly cause I like to run and I need it, and second I need the burned calories for my diet.
PMS ist just not bearable for me without chocolate. PERIOD. (ok, that was a bad joke ;)) But seriously, that time of a month I need extra food, cause I'm feeling gibberish enough.
...if my diet is everything I think about
we have a new colleague, and she said something like "Oh, you just got food as a topic" today. And it made me think if she is right. Dieting, meaning food, exercise, and everything connected to it, takes a lot of my thought. Sometimes it is the main thing I think about, even more than I think about friends, family, love interests or hobbies. It is one of my top goals and has absolute priority in my life. They say if you think more than four hours about food in total every day, you are prandial deranged (is this the right word?) Well, four hours, that would be just the time before lunch break for me.
I wonder if there will be a big hole in my life, if I will achieve my goal weight one day. Or if I'll never achieve it anyway, and for the rest of my life, I won't be able to settle my eating habits around my life but focusing justn around my diet. What a discouraging thought.
...why I drink so less milk
ok, those other two things are rather thoughful, and this one is not. It is just practical. Pre-diet days, I used to drink a lot of milk. I ate milk with my cornflakes, I drank it with honey, I mixed it with cholocate powder, I cooked with it etc. Now I hardly use milk anymore, cause it has so much points. Just a bit with my cereals every morning. Whenever I really crave something (chocolate, fries) I just eat it without thinking about points, but I'd never do that for milk though I love it.